Where There's a Will, There's an Herb

We're still committed to squeezing a baby out without any medicine, but that doesn't cover herbs. Today's "GET IT OUT OF ME" visit to the midwife yielded a massive herbal regimen. I don't know if these are going to work, have a placebo effect, or just get Veronica very stoned, but for your edification, here's a list of the ingredients in just ONE of the pills she's taking now:

• Alfalfa
• Lobelia
• Black & Blue Cohosh
• Spikenard Root
• Spirolina
• Thorny Pussywart
• Goat's Cum
• Acai Berry
• Loganberry
• Partridgeberry
• Dave Matthews Berry
• Gymnasium Sweat
• Banana Leaf
• Sycamore Dreams
• Labia Majora Juice
• Bacon Fat
• Sodium Pentothol
• Krokodil
• Calfskin Leather
• Corinthian Wheat Germ
• Hops
• Vaccine of Polio
• Tangible Benefit Sauce
• Silly Cobra Belly Mud
• Flatulence
• Hardened Snot Salts
• Jungle Boogie
• Jedi Dandruff
• Eye of Newt
• Cinnamon Spice
• Sporty Spice
• Everything Nice
• High Fructose Corn Syrup