Twitter. #AlternativesToOpenMics Chris Magyar (@chrisjmagyar) May 26, 2013
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We both know this first date isn't going to lead to a second date anyway. #AlternativesToOpenMics Chris Magyar...
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If you're wearing firefighter clothes and holding a bullhorn, you can interrupt any piano recital you want. #AlternativesToOpenMics...
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You're the Best Man? You're in luck! #AlternativesToOpenMics Chris Magyar (@chrisjmagyar) May 26, 2013
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Bus drivers control when the bus stops and also a little microphone. Bus companies are usually hiring. #AlternativesToOpenMics...
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The guy in the next stall is very weirded out by your talking, but he also really needs to finish that poop. #AlternativesToOpenMics...
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Some poisons take hours to kill. A well-placed suicide means everyone's there to hear your last words. #AlternativesToOpenMics...
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Everyone has an aunt or uncle they never call. That first phone call is bound to last at least five minutes. #AlternativesToOpenMics...
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You don't have to be Catholic to do into a confessional, and the priest has to listen to whatever you say. #AlternativesToOpenMics...
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