Journalist asks follow-up questions of famous people with quippy quotes

A writer should write with his eyes and a painter paint with his ears.

Gertrude Stein 

"As a women, what body part do you use?"

To love another person is to see the face of God.
Victor Hugo 

"During a break-up, does one get to see God's ass?"

Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.
Benjamin Franklin 

"What does Skype do? Also: can love be used as a +1 broadsword against orcs?"

Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration. 
Thomas A. Edison 

"Are you saying the inventor of antiperspirant was not a genius?"

Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe. 
Abraham Lincoln 

"Are all those hours billable?"

America has tossed its cap over the wall of space. 
John F. Kennedy 

"How do we know the cap cleared the wall?"

God not only plays dice, He also sometimes throws the dice where they cannot be seen. 
Stephen Hawking 

"Over the wall of space?"

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently. 
Henry Ford 

History is more or less bunk. 
Henry Ford 

"Um..."

Live your life as though your every act were to become a universal law. 
Immanuel Kant 

"Do you or do you not condone masturbation?"

Excellence is the best deterrent to racism or sexism. 
Oprah Winfrey 

"What else have you learned from Bill S. Preston, Esq.?"

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people. 
Eleanor Roosevelt

"So if I'm thinking about who to invite to a party..."

Wit is the epitaph of an emotion. 
Friedrich Nietzsche

"When emotions die, should we feel sad?"

The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth. 
Henry David Thoreau

"When emotions die, and we feel sad about it, are we lying?"

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. 
Mark Twain 

"Lies are immortal responses to dead emotions."